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September 20, 2011

Husband and I have been talking a lot lately about “putting off the natural man” and what it takes to do so.  Tonight in my scripture reading, I read something similar: “And thus the flesh becoming subject to the Spirit, or the Son to the Father, being one God, suffereth temptation, and yieldeth not to the temptation, but suffereth himself to be mocked, and scourged, and cast out, and disowned by his people […]  Yea, even so he shall be led, crucified, and slain, the flesh becoming subject even unto death, the will of the Son being swallowed up in the will of the Father.” (Mosiah 15:5, 7; italics for emphasis)  I've read these verses many times…  I can’t even begin to tell you how many times I've read through the Book of Mormon on my own, let alone the chance we've read/discussed these verses in class, etc.  But, I always read them as they pertain to Christ, our Savior.  But tonight, these particular words jumped out at me.  We look to Jesus as the ultimate example, and indeed He literally suffered for our sins.  Because of His Atonement, we don’t have to suffer.  But, we do need to become subject to the Spirit and not give in to temptation.  If we don’t, we will become subject to spiritual death.  It is vital to our eternal happiness and salvation that our will matches that of the Father’s.

As painful as it’s been, there have also been times of great joy in these last couple of weeks.  Yes, my joy does exceed my pain and I pray that one day that joy will last forever.  It’s been wonderful watching Husband transform into the Son of the Father.  I've always known his divine potential, but some days I can actually see his light and goodness radiate in and through him.  He’s glowing.  And he’s happy.  Husband is discovering how to subject himself to his natural spirit.  As much as I need and want to be healed, my greatest desire is to have Husband realize and embrace his divine heritage.  His happiness, not just in this life but in the life to come, is something I’m willing to fight for.  I've seen glimpses of a blissful eternity, and I look forward to sharing it with one of the Lord’s choice sons.